Saturday, January 15, 2005

 
Yee-Haww!

Round II: Slip won't show again, Bush promises US - The Economic Times

[Regarding Friday's ABC 20/20 interview...]
Days after the September 11, '01, attacks, Mr Bush said he wanted to catch Osama bin Laden “dead or alive”, a phrase that reinforced the US president’s international image as a cowboy.

Mr Bush said his wife, Laura, disapproved and “chewed me out right after that”. He said, “So I do have to be cautious about, you know, conveying thoughts in a way maybe that doesn’t send wrong impressions about our country.”


The world's most powerful man also happens to be pussy-whipped.

Needless to say, Bush has nixed operation "Burn mother fucker, burn" originally scheduled for later this year.






Thursday, January 13, 2005

 
Drive & Play

Oklahoma turnpike number exits at sex hotline:

OKLAHOMA CITY (Reuters) - Oklahoma highway users wishing to call the state about electronic payment passes were mistakenly directed to a sex hotline.

Oklahoma Transportation Authority spokeswoman Brigette Berglan said the state's turnpike authority had made an error in a letter sent to 41,000 people. One digit was wrong in the telephone number for callers seeking advice on how to deal with toll gate payments.

Instead, they found themselves calling a sex line where they could speak with 'exciting people', such as lonely housewives, students and fantasy girls for $2.99 a minute.
Gives a new meaning to toll road.

[Thanks to an overseas Kirk Young for the link. Check out his site at www.kirkyoung.net.]






Wednesday, January 12, 2005

 
Jesus Christ Superstore

Jesus Christ Superstore

It's God: the Action Figure!

-"His is the kingdom, the power and the glory"

-Includes Kingdom-Come
Kalashnikov AK-47 assault rifle

-Wearing Hallowed cloak of invulnerability
Jesus Christ and the Pope sold seperately...

No - seriously, they are. Right here.

[Props to JD Petty for the link... even though he's probably going to hell now.]






Tuesday, January 11, 2005

 
The Column: Icy Hot... Hell?

The Ball State Daily News - BEWILDERED SOCIETY: 'Ice Storm 2005' caused minor issues in grand scheme

"Do you have power?"

Quite possibly the most commonly heard phrase in Indiana over the last five days.

That is, next to, "They haven't fired Mike Davis yet?"

As Muncie and any town, city or ant colony within earshot began to climb out of the arctic tundra this past weekend, we started to see just how badly Mother Nature had backhanded East Central Indiana.

Many of us, at one point or another, have called Muncie "Hell." Well, I guess you could say it finally froze over.

As such, "Ice Storm 2005" (us media personnel are working on catchier names) left roughly 115,000 people in the dark for some period of time this past week. The snapping power lines and exploding transformers put together a blue-colored fireworks show across the sky Wednesday night. When the brownouts turned to blackouts, residents and students were forced to light up candles, throw on the extra blankets and swap electric refrigerators for coolers full of snow.

Indeed, primitive life is a modern day pain in the ass.

And yet, our own personal struggles often overshadow that of others whose warrant more attention. It's natural. After all, we are all human.

Yet, for students who thought of this "natural disaster" as a horrendous hassle, just consider what its like for the ungodly number of victims that have suffered through the aftermath of the Christmas Day tsunami.

Not having power just plain... sucks. In our wired (err, now wireless) culture, we rely on electricity more than we realize. But if we think that the lack of power is worth being horribly upset over, we truly cannot comprehend what those victims are dealing with.

It will take years for the trees on this campus to resume their full posture and splendor, a sight that existed at this time just one week ago. However, when put in comparison to the tsunami, we should be thanking every lucky star, branch and power line that we still have trees.

More importantly, we should be pleased that there have been no fatalities. Even in the big scheme of things, the amount of property damage and number of personal injuries are considerably low. The same cannot be said for those living along those coastal areas, which are now in state of unbelievable disarray, with not only mementos and homes, but lives that can never, ever be replaced.

This is not at all to say that we have tried to compare ourselves to those victims overseas. However, their situation should make us realize how lucky we are.

We have power now.

We have heat, as well.

We have fresh food and clean water.

We have our friends and family.

That's a lot more than those still rising number of victims can say. For that, we should be thankful, and for them, we owe our deepest sympathy.

Our American soldiers, Red Cross volunteers and other International aid organizations deserve our emotional and monetary thanks for helping on our behalf. They are there, so we can be here.

And so, for those of us who had thought it, Hell never did freeze over.

Not here, at least.






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