Thursday, July 31, 2003
Tollbooth workers have tall tales to tell
WARNING: Don't drink and drive! Not only does it impair your ability to control your vehicle, but it may also make you think a change collector is a urinal.
As if it's possible to embarrass Las Vegas any more...
Promoter Who Offered Nude Hunting Trips Accused of Staging a Hoax, Faces Charges
LAS VEGAS (AP) - A promoter who offered to take men on "Hunting for Bambi" safaris in which they could hunt down naked young women with paintball guns admits that it was a hoax and now faces misdemeanor charges, the mayor said Friday.
These charges are light when compared to the embarrassment of the dumbasses who actually thought something like this existed.
Signs celebrating deaths of Saddam's sons criticized
CLARKSVILLE, Tenn. - State-hired paving contractors say they were being patriotic when they posted the words "Odai and Qusai dead - way to go 101st" on two electronic message boards.
But some found the roadside messages about the deaths of Saddam Hussein's sons offensive rather than inspiring.
More proof conservative people suck.
Tuesday, July 29, 2003
U.S. warns of 9/11-style plane attacks
In a warning issued Saturday to aviation and law enforcement officials, the Department of Homeland Security outlined a possible al-Qaeda plan to use suicide hijackers who would seize control of airplanes and crash them into government, military or economic targets. The warning, among the most specific of scores the department issued, said the attack could come by summer's end.
Uhoh! Better boost up security again...
Air marshals pulled from key flights
Despite renewed warnings about possible airline hijackings, the Transportation Security Administration has alerted federal air marshals that as of Friday they will no longer be covering cross-country or international flights, MSNBC.com has learned. The decision to drop coverage on flights that many experts consider to be at the highest risk of attack apparently stems from a policy decision to rework schedules so that air marshals don’t have to incur the expense of staying overnight in hotels.
Doh!
If you've ever seen the comcast commerical (why they show it on cable, I do not know) that shows two classy parents out to dinner while their son is at home trying to hack the cable converter - there's a key point that Comcast leaves out:
If the kid is smart enough to figure out how to access a password menu, he's just as easily capable of unplugging the damn converter box from the wall and plugging the cable line directly into the frickin' TV....
Not to mention: eating a dinner like they are, the parents probably have a non-digital hookup in the other room anyway.
Whoops.
NAPSTER to return in rather "jewed" form...
The new service may carry the Napster name, but it will have little else in common with the original, which provided a means for users to download music free of charge before it was forced to shut down in 2001 after losing court battles with the music industry.
Unlike its predecessor, Napster 2.0 will have the blessing of the five major record companies and many independent labels. But users will have to pay to download music files, and some of the song files will have restrictions on a variety of usage rights, such as how many times they can be burned onto CDs or moved to a portable digital music player, if at all.
FOX taking another step in showcasing natural selection
It might have been called "Extreme Impalement," but in reality, the hourlong special's title couldn't be more precise: "101 Things Removed from the Human Body" is not for the squeamish.
Monday, July 28, 2003
Teens may face charges for defacing northeast Portland statue:
Two teenagers could face vandalism charges for allegedly dumping paint on a popular northeast Portland landmark.
Authorities say the boys told them they did it because the statue was too shiny.
Could ya have at least thought of something even slightly creative?
The Columbus Dispatch Online: Archival Article:
In his struggle with paranoid schizophrenia, Greg Lindeman was convinced he was Jesus Christ.
Lindeman, 45, killed himself Friday, jumping from a seven-story parking garage at the Ohio State University Medical Center, authorities said.
A police report issued early Monday stated that after a long investigation authorities had concluded Lindeman was not actually Jesus Christ.
©2003-2007 David Studinski/Bewildered Society, unless otherwise noted.